When is the best time for marriage counseling?

By: Dr. Jennifer B. Lagrotte, DMFT


When is it time to go to marriage counseling? The first year of marriage was wonderful, but three years later it has started to become a little rocky. When a couple first ties the knot, they are blinded by each otherís relatively new love for each other. Now, as some of the initial infatuation has worn off, there are a few more disagreements and a lack of communication for the couple. Before a couple actually gets married, it is recommended by many people that going to see a marriage counselor might be the best thing to do. The counselor can take an impartial view of their relationship and discuss with the couple some things they can do to ensure a long and happy marriage.

First, letís look at the myth of marriage counseling. Plain and simple, most people will make the mistake of saying that marriage counseling is for those married couples who already have problems in their marriage. While this is true, it is not entirely true. Marriage counseling is for those who are suffering difficulties in their married lives, but it is also for those who have a healthy married life and want to ensure it continues to be a healthy marriage, or for those who are contemplating marriage; who want to ensure they are making the right decision and will have a healthy marriage.

When thinking about marriage, the most common things people think of are a happy wife and husband, a couple of happy kids, a house, the two cars and a fairly good, easy life. In reality, marriage takes hard work. It also takes good communication between the individuals involved and the ability to accept when you are wrong. A marriage takes two to act as one in order to exist properly. If you have an unbalanced relationship that does not have an equality of both the husband and wife, you will have a marriage destined to become unhealthy and possibly fall apart. The reality of life also has a habit of throwing a wrench in the works too. It could be the husband gets laid off from his job, which can lead to monetary problems, or the husband is feeling neglected because the wife is spending too much time out with her friends. It could even be that the wife works during the day and the husband is working night shifts, so they barely see each other or have a chance to talk. These are just a few of the many situations that can cause a great deal of stress on a marriage. Talking to a marriage counselor before the problems get too big is always the best thing to do. If the couple is feeling the marriage is not working, or is starting to fall apart in any way, it might be time to seek out a marriage counselor.

Online counseling is a quick and easy way to get help fast. Through online therapy, an online counselor can help the couple work through any disagreements the couple may have, teach them how to communicate their feelings properly and can help a couple work through the stresses they might be feeling from everyday life. An online therapist can also help the couple think about making some possible changes in their life that might make their life less stressful and busy. Sometimes, it just helps to have a marriage counselor remind a married couple that a marriage is all about being together to support and help each other through life, regardless of what happens.

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Dr. Jennifer Baxt, DMFT, NCC,DCC is the owner of CompleteCounselingSolutions.com which offers a variety of online counseling services. If you would like to know more about Jennifer or any of our online therapists, visit our website.

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