What do you do when life is not what it should be?

By: Dr. Jennifer B. Lagrotte, DMFT

Just about everyone reaches a point in their life when they review their past and present and wonder if they have made too many mistakes along the way. Whether it is that they think they have not made enough money, have not made it as far in the career as they thought they would have, or their life is in no way what they originally thought it would be, many can find themselves wondering if they made too many wrong decisions in the past. While remembering lessons learned in the past can benefit one's future, one has to be careful not to dwell on the past lest they forget to look in the direction they are going in life.

The first thing one should realize when they start thinking this way is that the past is done and there is nothing they can do to change it. The next step would be to start thinking about all the positive things that exist in one's life, such as the loving spouse they chose to marry. It can be very easy for anyone to start becoming a little more pessimistic about themselves and their lives, especially if they have hit a bit of a rough patch. It could be that they have been struggling financially for the last couple years, which can be understandable if there have been layoffs and/or a recession that can put just about anyone in a bad mood. It takes a little more effort, but working on being more optimistic and focusing more on the good things one has is important when life is starting to look less than what one thinks it should be. Life is unpredictable, and despite how much one tries to stay with their plans, things happen that are beyond anyone's control. All one can do in these cases is go with the flow and try to make the best of the current situation.

When life starts to look a little grim and one is finding it difficult to find the good in their current situation, contacting an online counselor might be a good idea. Before saying no to this idea, consider that an online therapist can offer an objective and impartial view on one's life. The online therapist could also offer some interesting suggestions about the sorts of things one should be focusing on or changing in their lives in order to brighten things up a bit. Online therapy can be a great way for one to get their problems out in the open, such as things that have been bothering them for a while. In turn, this can help one start to realize what it is that might be drowning out all their optimism. Online counseling can also help one to find out more about what changes they can make in themselves and their lives in order to make their life more of what they believe it should be. Life will never be perfect; it will never go 100 percent the way one plans it, but there are always other paths in life one can take that can make it as close to being perfect as it can be.

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Dr. Jennifer Lagrotte, DMFT is the owner of CompleteCounselingSolutions.com which offers a variety of online counseling services. If you would like to know more about Jennifer or any of our online therapists, visit our website.

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