What To Do With An Infidelity Partner

By: K Michael

Cheating, infidelity, adultery, unfaithfulness, disloyalty - call it what you wish. These days, more and more spouses within a marriage or partners in a supposedly committed relationship are cheating on their significant other.

When you initially walk into a committed relationship, you obviously expect your spouse to stay faithful. But what if you sense that your spouse is detaching himself or herself from you emotionally? Your spouse might be attempting to act natural, but instinct tells you that there is definitely something suspicious. Rather than looking at your relationship through rose-colored glasses, you need to confront reality and discover if anything is actually occuring. When you realize the truth later on, it is enormously devastating if you discover your spouse has been cheating on you.

Making Way for Your Grief

When infidelity moves in, trust moves out of your relationship. For a while there, your head is filled with pictures of those instances which should have been your clue that your spouse is engaging in an affair and worse yet, pictures of your spouse engaged in intimacy with another fill your mind. Anger, rage, bewilderment, grief and depression all set in. This is true whether you just think that your spouse is cheating, or if you have already proven it.

How do you make way for your grief? Number one, you ought to face the fact that you are the one cheated on. In spite of the heartbreak, one question which might boggle your mind is whether or not you have done anything, which led to your spouses cheating ways. This is a natural instinct, since you still cannot believe that the individual who you promised your love to really went out and totally betrayed you. Obviously, your trust towards your spouse will be lost, but at times we have a tendency to put the blame on our own selves.

When of all this happens, the primary thing that you need to consider is that it is much better to confront the topic head-on. If you keep a blind eye to your spouses cheating ways, you are only delaying the inevitable. It is what it is, and more than everything it is time to deal with the truth, deal with it and move on. Blaming yourself or your spouse at this stage is meaningless.

Taking Your Future into Your Own Hands

So what happens after that? To a very large degree, it is essentially up to you. After confronting the reality that cheating has occurred in your relationship and learning all the facts, which led to the infidelity, it is by and large your decision whether you aim to make things work out with your spouse or not. One option is to take a break from each other and from the relationship - and find out if the breathing room which you will both experience will put things into proper perspective. Or, an alternative option is to just call it over. None the less, many couples stay together and then attempt to work through it. This requires hard work, but at this stage absolutely nothing is what you would call simple. In any circumstance, it will take a while for the wounds to heal and for the scars to disappear, no matter what direction you decide to go.

Regardless of what instance winds up happening with you, what is key is that you can ultimately move on with your life. Obviously, you cannot get over all the emotions assailing you right away - but deciding to to face the reality is already a large step. After being with a cheating partner, your self-worth may be in shreds, your world turned upside down and your emotions may well be a total mess. Even so, that is just a stage that you need to go through.

WARNING! If you do choose to split, you must attempt to stay single for at least one year to allow adequate time to become truly centered and re-establish your inner balance. You need to come to a place of calm and realize that your self fulfillment begins inside yourself and will not be attained if this is not your foundation. Take a year to get there, and you will be happy you did! It will take about that long to sort through all your feelings, purify your heart and get level headed.


Slowly, but surely, you can continue to put small pieces of your life back together, begin the healing process and be on your way towards moving on as a new and improved version of your previous self. The whole experience can quite literally make a better person out of you in the long run, and you can rest assured that love and joy will return to you.

Just remember that what you think about and how you feel about things creates your life. All you have to do is question yourself what you are prepared to accept into your life? Sometimes we have no control over which cards we are dealt, but we definitely have control over what ones we keep and what ones we play, the beliefs that we have and the ones we throw away.

Resources to start you in the winning direction are at http://infidelity-concerns.Com. Keep on keeping on as they say! Put on a smile, things are definitely going to get better!

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Proven methods to expose cheating partners and free resources to begin the discovery process, plus healing techniques to help you move on with your life: www.Infidelity-Concerns.com. Here is a great help for the people who are facing betrayal, for more information visit: www.infidelity-concerns.com/extramaritalaffairs.

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