The sinsod, or dowry is such a controversial subject that it warrants further inspection and another article. This is always a hotbed of controversy because parents of the bride are essentially putting a value on their own daughter. The value of their daughter is determined by factors that are just as controversial as the idea of the payment itself. Such factors include the woman’s age, whether or not she has children and whether or not she is still a virgin.
Outside of the seedy areas of Thailand most women are still virgins and live with their parents. It is customary for that to stay that way until marriage where it all changes but the old values are still maintained. Many men, especially Western ones cannot get their head around this. The allure of a bedding a virgin is strong but getting married to one who still lives with her parents can often be a definite turn off. We have all seen the movie ‘the 40 year old virgin’ with Steve Carell (if you have not then it is recommended) and we all laughed at it as in Western society being in the same situation at that age is just wrong.
Well nobody told Thailand and whilst Thailand is becoming less and less conservative there are still plenty of women who are virgins living with their parents until marriage. Another aspect is whether or not the woman has children from a previous marriage or out of wedlock. Essentially the dowry and its value is quite similar to going to market looking for a prize pig to buy. I know that is quite harsh but it really helps put the dowry in perspective when you look at it like that. Okay, a better way of looking at it is getting a bargain off eBay although that then is still a bad analogy as it conjures up images of mail order brides from remote parts of the world.
But many people are also deluded about the sinsod in the sense that they exaggerate the amount of money given and such. In actuality it is mostly for show. It will be shown to everyone on the wedding day to ensure that there is no loss of face and it also shows that you are dedicated in what you are doing as the groom. The parents of your bride will most likely return the sinsod after the ceremony or will reciprocate in kind through purchasing a car or condo for you and your bride to be. Besides, if you wanted to get married in Thailand then you must be prepared to have to respect and abide by the rules that legally bind you and your bride as man and wife. If you are not able to do that then marriage to a Thai woman may not be for you. Either way, it is a big decision and one that is not to be taken lightly so make sure you are 100% sure before you take the plunge otherwise it may end up in divorce which is what is discussed in other articles.
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