Kiss Me Not

By: Mike Durand

It would be irresponsible not to talk about kissing and smoking, wouldnít it? For it is a well known fact that these are two of lifeís greatest pleasures, no doubt about it. But if you are one of those people who assume that they can be practiced within the same lifetime you are sorely mistaken.

For most of the great kissers in this world (and they hopefully include someone within your inner circle), kissing a smoker is not fun. As a matter of fact, the people in the ranks of great kissers all feel the same way that kissing a smoker is a real crusher, you look forward to that first kiss and then itís ruined because of the smell and taste of cigarettes. If you think this is an ĎUsí and ĎThemí issue, it is not. For the list of great kissers includes OTHER smokers, I am sorry to say.

Let us tick off the small, but obvious reasons why.

Smoking smells if you havenít noticed; it smells terrible. And if anyone who is worth their weight wants a kiss they will not choose you as their first choice no matter how attracted they are to you. In fact you will fall down to very near the bottom of their list. You smell like the bad factory that we all close our noses when we pass you by. And kissing that is not such a romantic notion.

If by chance you have been blessed by the gods and are being kissed, hopefully on a regular basis, by someone you want to kiss back; then you should first and foremost consider yourself very lucky for it is highly unlikely that they enjoy it, unless of course they are smokers themselves and donít notice the smell or taste. In essence you are silently ruining this cherishable gift. Whoever this person is that is kissing you is sacrificing the experience of a great kiss, and itís because of you. You get to kiss someone with sweet breath, and they donít? How does that work? That adds up to kiss abuse. Would you want to kiss an exhaust pipe? Or maybe a day old bag of garbage? I didnít think so.

The smell problem extends far beyond the time you have had a cigarette, I am sure you know that. You can smoke one cigarette in the morning and still be largely un-kissable at night. So do the math: If you smoke more than one cigarette a day, then you are turning yourself into a bit of a pariah in the kissing department.

Mints and mouthwash wonít help either. The amount of chemicals that are now placed in cigarettes to make the whole smoking experience more pleasant have had a disastrous effect on the smell they produce. Nothing will take it away, so even if you eat a packet of mints before kissing it wonít make any difference.

If you want that lasting impression you give to someone to be Yuck! Patooey! Then the only thing to say is go for it; smoke all you want. On the other hand if you want to be lovable and considerate then there is only one choice for you and tobacco it is not.

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