Jokes: On Men and On Women

By: Jack Reider

Relations between the man and the woman have been frequently parodied and laughed at. And in this article, I will continue this tradition.

A) What is Sex?
In a survey conducted by the National Bureau of Statistic, different professionals gave different answers.

A-1) The Doctor:
Sex is a disease because you always end up in bed.

A-2) The Lawyer:
Sex is definitely unjust. Always, there is one person on top and the other one under that person.

A-3) The Engineer:
Sex is the perfect machine because this unit works whenever you want it to.

A-4) The Architect:
Sex is a mistake. And this is because the place where all the fun takes place has been placed at the exits.

A-5) The Politician:
It is the perfect democracy because everyone has fun whether they are on top or not.

A-6) The Economist:
It is a bad investment. What you put in is much bigger than what you take out.

B) The Closed Door Syndrome
A husband comes home and finds the door locked. He calls to his wife, "My dear, could you please open the door?"
She replies, "I'm sorry, but I cannot. I am not dressed."
He laughs," It is ok. I am alone."
She replies," I am not."

C) The Complaint of the First Woman
Eve goes up to the almighty and complains, "why does Adam have a limb protruding from his body while I do not?"
The almighty replies, "What shall I do with you, dear Eve? How many times have I to tell you that that limb is yours. Adam is just carrying it for you."

D) A Handsome Couple
A handsome man and a beautiful woman are making love, He turns to her.
"Oh my dear, because you are my first one, I will call you Eve."
"Thank you," she answers and replies, "And because you were my 206, I will call you Peugeot."

E) Restaurant Meeting
A couple are dining in a posh restaurant and eating dinner. Suddenly, the man jumps down from his chair and crawls under the table. The waiter comes up to the woman and asks, "Madam, is your husband feeling fine?"
The woman looked down and replied, "He is not my husband. My husband is standing at the entrance."

F) Girl and Mother
A girl complains to her mother," It is twelve in the night and he is still not home. I am telling you he is having an affair."
Her mother calms her down ,"Come on. Why are you so pessimistic? Maybe all that happened is that he was run over."

G) Hard Work
A wife wakes up her husband in the morning, "My dear, you are working too hard. All through the night you kept whispering the name of your secretary."

H) Fortune Revealed
A fortune teller stares at the palm of the woman in front of her and says, "I see that you will soon be very happy in the arms of a young man."
The woman looks back and whispers, "Say, can you see anything in my palm on how my husband would react to that?"

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Cajetan Basco loves a good laugh, and when he is not appraising online casinos for a living, he makes up and edits humour and parodies on life and male-female relations.

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