Expose Your Prospect's Core

By: Kenrick Cleveland..


"It is your work in life that is the ultimate seduction." -- Pablo Picasso

Sometimes in persuasion, the thing to do is to get provocative. I'm not talking about being inappropriate or crass, I'm not talking about being overtly sexual, but I am suggesting that you access the core drives a little, those primal drives that link each and every one of us as human animals, and specifically I'm thinking of the drive to reproduce.

When you hear the word seduction your mind probably thinks of sex or luring someone away from proper conduct or accepted mores. Another definition of seduction is to win over and attract. Sounds a lot like persuasion. We are literally enticing someone into our mindsets or desired outcomes.

A heterosexual male friend once told me that they flirt with everyone -- men, women, grandmas, grandpas, all nationalities, ages, shapes, sizes. At first I found this incredibly odd until I thought about it. They weren't 'flirting' in the way that people flirt with each other to "hook up" (I have teenagers, so in the parlance of our time) with someone. They were flirting to charm and flatter. This was a radical reframe in my mind and a fantastic way to be in the world. When are you at your best? When you're trying to impress someone with the deeply charming version of yourself which is usually reserved for attracting a mate, right?

Here's another way to view this: it's rapport with a twist.

Now, this isn't for everyone. For example, for women, this can be a rather messy can of worms if not done with very clear boundaries. Men are highly susceptible to being flirted with or being charmed and the best bet is to be extremely obvious that this is how you interact with everyone, not just them. Everyone loves to be given special attention and this form of rapport and criteria elicitation incites that very delightful feeling of being given that special attention.

Here's another way to access this powerful motivator, simply insert into your conversation words that are titillating. This is a more subtle way of stimulating this drive that can give sometimes vague, sometimes intense triggers of that core drive.

Phew. . . did you catch that? I was just giving an example and got a little carried away, but now you get the idea.

If you overdo this one, you will appear creepy and/or dangerous or worse! But these little additions can really expose a powerful way to persuade.

So while I may not exactly admit to being a flirt, I will say that I do enjoy the process of charming as a way to persuade and, in general, a way to make people feel good.

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Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to earn the business of affluent prospects using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion techniques.

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