BDSM and Age Old Myths

By: Sonia Ingriselli


Sexual behaviour has been studied for over a century; probably even much further back in our history than that. But, mainstream studies have certainly cast a light into worlds we often thought were dark and mysterious. The world of BDSM is no stranger to mystery, myth and unfortunately ridicule.

Most of us should probably be incredibly thankful to be alive in such a time as the 21st century. Sexuality, acts and otherwise, dominates the Internet, and in some cases, dominates the news. When the average person thinks of BDSM (Bondage, Dominance, Sadomasochists), their mind automatically deflects to sexual deviance or worse, sexual perversion. In all honesty, the mistress or dominatrix as it were, really takes a “beating” when it comes to reputation.

We can’t really blame society however, considering it was only 30 or so years ago, that the mere mention of sex or any type of sexual play and behaviour was off limits or to taboo in nature. Sex just wasn’t a topic discussed around the water cooler back in 1965. Yes, phrases or accusations really come to mind, such as “dirty minds”, or one’s mind being in the “gutter”. We’ve come pretty far considering what we had to put up with back in the day. The next big taboo is bondage and BDSM, a taboo that is beginning to make an exit, opening up to mainstream in ways most couldn’t have imagined.

But still, at the end of the day, BDSM, bondage and other forms of alternative sexual behaviour is unfortunately surrounded in many myths. We can go through some of those myths in this article, but first it’s best to explain or define some of the terms of BDSM.

What is Bondage?

Sounds like something out of the old-testament doesn’t it? Well, far from the bible, when it comes to bondage, even though it does involve a bit of spanking (whipping), the act when regarding BDSM is consensual. By consensual, we mean both parties involved want to experience a different kind of pleasure.

Bondage involves dominance, and half the time, femdom. Most sexually healthy couples refer to it as kinky, or role-playing; it can involve tying up your partner with fluffly handcuffs, or even sexy red scarves. It’s an act that happens between two consenting adults, in the bedroom after a bit of fun. No blood is drawn or marks left, unless it is a special request of course!

Here are the top myths surrounding BDSM:

#1 People who participate in BDSM must have been abused as children
This is one of the biggest myths surrounding BDSM. When it comes to sexual preference and how or what we do in the bedroom, it simply is deeply personal. The “abuse” scenario is a big misconception and a bit of a stereotype as well. Couples all across the world enjoy getting a little kinky to spice things up, yet no one looks down their noses at them.

#2 BDSM is violent and involves torture

Again, it comes down to preference and personal choice. The term BDSM, although broad in many ways, also has sadomasochism slapped there on the end. S&M however, is once again, between two consenting adults. When it comes to S&M, one party is under extreme dominance, this much is true; however, they do so by choice, and in most cases initiate a protective safe word.

#3 It is perversion and harmful

It’s not harmful at all. The term perversion on the other hand, is offensive. Directing these sort of comments to those who participate in BDSM is what can be classified as harmful. Like stated in our introduction, society has come far when it comes to lifting the taboos on discussing sex or how to pleasure one another. Like it or not, there are millions of people who enjoy being dominated in the bedroom; and at the end of the day, BDSM falls neatly into that category.

Millions of couples take the time to explore their sexuality with each other. Just like millions of couples like to experiment in the bedroom to spice things up. Kinky is now a way of life, and its time the grandfather of kink, which is BDSM was released from the old age home for a breath of fresh air.

So, if you are thinking of giving bondage or BDSM a whirl, don’t fear and get ready to explore an aspect of yourself you didn’t think possible. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and all you need is a loving partner who’s willing to take the journey with you.

Check out http://www.evilsangels.com/en for more information!!

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Evils Angels is situated in Marbella, located in the South of Spain. Dispelling myths, and promoting healthy relationships, along with a healthy lifestyle that involves BDSM. Bondage is rarely understood and at times completely misunderstood. The ladies at Evils Angels only wish to educate and promote a different style of love.

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